I recently did an assignment on body image and social media and it made me think –   Growing up in the age of social media has been weird.  

Growing up as an actor and competitive dancer has probably contributed to that as well. I often feel like everyone is against me. Even my BEST friends and I are being compared to each other and put up against each other. There is a connection that comes with that though, we’ve seen each other grow up, and we’ve seen each other at our highest and lowest.  I’ve had Instagram since I was a little kid, I was encouraged to use it to post anything good I did. But why do achievements only matter if they are shared? I think I was seven or eight when I had my first account, and while I didn’t have full control, I still remember really starting to care about how I looked. It felt normal at the time because all my friends had social media, but now 10 years later, I’m seventeen, and I wish I was only getting Instagram now.  

I am so grateful for everything I’ve been able to do, but sometimes I wonder what my life would look like without the pressure to perform all the time, in real life, and online as well. I feel like I don’t really know who I am aside from dancing and acting. Sometimes I wonder if my life would be different if I was born like three decades earlier, or if I grew up playing soccer or something. I can never imagine myself not performing, but I just wish the people in the industry were nicer. I know if I really love it, I’ll push through it, but its hard sometimes.  But at the same time, I’m grateful for social media. It’s given me access to so many inspirational people, actors, dancers, advocates, creators, who have been open about their struggles and journeys. Seeing people I look up to talk honestly about mental health, body image, and their experiences in the industry has made me feel SO much less alone.  

I often hear people say ‘I want to be the person my teenage self needed’, and as a teenager, I can confidently say that they have been. And for that, I am grateful for social media.  This probably sounds really silly, but the idea that one day, I might be able to use the struggles I’m going through now, the things that feel like they are taking up my whole life, to help someone else feel less alone, is really inspiring. Like I could be the person that so many incredible people have been for me. I don’t really know what I want to do with my life, but I think I just want to make people feel less alone, and then I will be really happy.  

So I don’t know if growing up at the same time has been a good or bad thing? It has had its flaws, but at the same time, I’m grateful. So grateful.