I’m concerned for my fellow young ladies and women who are struggling with body dysmorphia and embracing their femininity. I’m undergoing a transformative time in my life inspired by deep contemplation, meditation, and self awareness.

I’m learning how to rewrite the narratives and ‘truths’ I was exposed to in my youth and adolescence. Some of these narratives, like body image, I find impossible to escape. Feeling trapped within the confines of Hollywood’s beauty standards and what The Media has conditioned me to believe is society’s collective expectation of women.For the last 23 years I have equated Beautiful and Feminine to words like dainty, petite, and fragile. I’ve always struggled with body dysmorphia, equating my worth to how small my waist is. I’ve always felt “too..” to be beautiful, too masculine, too muscular, too fat. Always envying the models, the actresses, the cheerleaders; even when I was the cheerleader and the model. I learned to hate my genetics, idolizing women “blessed” with that specific body type, never embracing my own to be different yet equally attractive.

Here I am, 23, trying to figure this all out. Teaching myself to question what I know and replace it with what is ME. I’m tired of looking in the mirror and saying “I’ll be pretty when..,” when my thighs are tighter, when my skin clears.I’m at the start of my journey. I’m overwhelmed, a little lost, but I know it can only get better from here. I know I’ll look back at this moment and thank myself for putting in the mental work.