I just turned 30. Past year I was taking care of my mom with early-onset Alzheimer’s. Within a year she went from the most independent and fierce woman to an old lady laying in bed in a special care home. I never would have imagined how our roles could turn around. The bittersweet fact is that it healed our relationship in a way. In the end, I enjoyed helping her shower and seeing how such a small comfort made her happy. But there was nothing more difficult than watching her suffer and accepting that this is our life now, for both of us. I can’t even think about that she cannot enjoy even a shower anymore and her world shrunk to that bed. I never met my dad and I do not have siblings. Even so, I was always missing my dad but I was never too sad about the siblings. But now I wish I had someone to carry this with me and to make the decision with me. No one can do this instead of me, only a brother or sister could. In ways, I feel distant from my peers due to this; they cannot really understand. They support me and praise me, I hope they do not feel sorry for me. But I cannot really hide this part of my life, so I am okay with being the different one once more. In the end, I always feel that I am lucky. Last time I came to visit my mom, who cannot really lead a conversation anymore, she saw me and said: “Wow, you are magic. I have a mom who loves me.” I hope that if I keep this real and feel what is to be felt, it will always have a purpose.